250 Best Dad Jokes: Funny, Bad, Corny, Cheesy, and Hilarious

What’s the signature of a dad joke? His unique sense of humor naturally shines through as soon as a dad earns his title. Unwittingly, he starts rolling out pun-filled quips in abundance, just like his father and his grandfather before him. And remember the mom jokes that might sneak into his collection too! (A funny grandma in the mix? That’s usually a vital clue.)

Even though dad jokes can provoke a groan, a part of us secretly cherishes these paternal jests that are so silly they’re innovative, even ingenious. (You can try to refute it, but we see you there, the one who just searched for “funny dad jokes.”)

So, to celebrate dads who are the jokers of the family, we’ve gathered the finest of the finest corny dad jokes and puns for your enjoyment.

Funny Dad Jokes

1. Do you know the reason behind Scarecrow getting a promotion? It stood out in its field!
2. Have you any information about the eatery on Mars? Delicious food, zero gravity!
3. I told my spouse to accept her flaws. I received a warm hug.
4. Why are atoms so unreliable? They constitute everything!
5. I could share a joke about time travel, but you didn’t find it amusing in the future.
6. Why are farms the worst places for gossip? Because corn lends an ear and potatoes keep an eye out.
7. Why are atoms never truthful? They’re always making things up!
8. I don’t participate in soccer for enjoyment. I’m just in it for the kicks!
9. Why do eggs avoid cracking jokes? They might end up breaking up!
10. Why do melons need marriage? Because they cant-elope.
11. What was the grape’s reaction when it got crushed? It just whined a bit.
12. Why do actors need to ‘break a leg’? Every play needs a cast, after all!
13. Why can’t a bicycle stand alone? It’s too tired.
14. What’s the name of a fish adorned with royal attire? A monarch of the sea!
15. I initially learned to play the piano by listening, but now my fingers take over.

Best Dad Jokes

16. Would you like to hear a humorous anecdote about building construction? Still building that one.
17. I’d steer clear of the sushi if I were you. It seems a tad fishy.
18. Did you hear about the school nap incident? It’s fine, and the kid woke up!
19. Ever heard about the chocolate turntable? It sounds incredibly sweet.
20. I wouldn’t purchase anything with velcro. It’s a complete rip-off.
21. I’m perusing a book about defying gravity. It’s too gripping to put down!
22. Did you hear about the mathematician who dreads negative numbers? He wouldn’t hesitate to do anything to sidestep them.
23. I’m concerned about the calendar, and its days are inevitably counted.
24. Why are chicken coops made with two entrances? If there were four of them, they would look like cars designed for chickens!
25. Why was the belt apprehended? For tight-up trousers!
26. What do you name a man with an artificial digit on his foot? Robo-toe.
27. Why was the portrait sent to prison? It was found framed.
28. Why did the bicycle topple over? It was excessively fatigued!
29. Have you heard about the creator of Lifesavers? He minted quite a wealth!

Bad Dad Jokes

30. I recommend to my better half that she should own up to her errors. She enveloped me in an embrace.
31. What made the tomato turn a rosy hue? It caught a glimpse of the salad undressing.
32. How do you get a space party started? By planet-ing ahead.
33. I’d share a pizza joke, but its energy is too cheesy.
34. What’s orange and has a parrot-like nature? A carrot.
35. What’s brown and adheres? A stick.
36. Can February take a march? No, but April may.
37. Why did the bike lose its way home? It misplaced its directions.
38. Did you get wind of the fire at the circus? It was extremely intense.
39. Why couldn’t the leopard partake in hide and seek? It was too conspicuous.
40. What’s a cat’s preferred hue? Purple.
41. Why don’t skeletons wage wars? They lack the stomach for it.
42. What did one restroom communicate to another? You look washed out.

Corny and Cheesy Dad Jokes

43. What do you name fake pasta? An im-pasta!
44. What type of cheese do you have no claim over? Not-your cheese.
45. Did you hear the tale of the dozing student? It ended well, and he woke up.
46. How do you make a squirrel notice you? Behave nuttily!
47. I could crack a joke about a dysfunctional pencil, but… it’s pointless.
48. Why do actors need to “break a leg”? Each play has a cast, after all.
49. I’d keep away from the edo-mae if I were you. Seems a little fishy.
50. I’m absorbed in a book about zero gravity. It’s too riveting to set aside.
51. Why did the math book look so distressed? It was burdened with problems.
52. Did you hear about the inferno at the circus? It was exceedingly intense.
53. Did you get wind of the cheese factory detonation in France? There was nothing remaining but de Brie.
54. What do you label a can opener that doesn’t work? A can’t opener.
55. How does a penguin assemble its house? It just ice-glues it together.
56. Why isn’t a leopard good at hide and seek? It stands out too much.
57. What happened when the grape got pressed? It could only whine a little.

Good Dad Jokes

58. Why was the bike having trouble standing? It was too exhausting!
59. Why do scientists have a hard time trusting atoms? Because they literally fabricate everything!
60. Why did the biscuit visit a doctor? It wasn’t quite feeling its best.
61. What’s the color brown and tends to stick? Just a stick!
62. Why did they apprehend the belt? It was holding up trousers.
63. What’s the term for pretend pasta? An im-pasta!
64. Did you hear the news about the snoozing kid at school? It’s alright, and he finally woke up.
65. Why was the scarecrow given a medal? It was doing an outstanding job in its field.
66. What’s a bee’s favorite grooming tool? A honeycomb!
67. What do you name cheese that isn’t yours? That’s nacho cheese!
68. Why did the golfer have an additional set of pants? In the event, he got a hole-in-one.
69. How do you orchestrate a space party? Simply by planet-ing.
70. What’s the term for a can opener that fails to function? A can’t opener.
71. What did one brick wall say to the other? See you at the corner.

Christmas Dad Jokes

72. Why was the decoration so enamored with Christmas? It was tree-mendously hooked.
73. What would you call a cat at the beach during Christmas? Sandy Claus!
74. How does a snowman travel around? By chilling on an ‘icicle.
75. What’s a snowman with impressive abs called? An abdominal snowman.
76. Why was the mathematics book unhappy during Christmas? It had an overwhelming number of problems.
77. Who says Oh Oh Oh? Santa is going in reverse.
78. What do you name a self-centered elf? Elfish.
79. Why don’t Christmas trees engage in knitting? They’re constantly shedding their spikes.
80. Why does Santa Claus prefer the smokestack? Because it flatters him!
81. What do you name Santa when he accidentally arrives in the Antarctic? A lost clause.
82. What’s the result of crossing a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite.
83. Who is Santa’s favorite pop star? Elf-is Presley!
84. How do sheep greet each other during the festive season? “Season’s bleatings to ewe!”
85. What’s the term for a reindeer with a fondness for comedy? A Comet-edian.
86. What do you name an elf who has a great singing voice? A Wrapper!

Stupid Dad Jokes

87. Why are some fish afraid to play piano? They dread the keys!
88. Why was the scarecrow honored with an award? He was unparalleled on his terrain… though the competition was sparse.
89. What do you name a boomerang that refuses to return? Just a stick.
90. Why should a train never be trusted? It has suspicious “loco-motives.”
91. Why are oysters stingy? Because they are incredibly shellfish.
92. Did you catch the story about the two aerials that got hitched? The wedding was decent, but the after-party was phenomenal!
93. In which way do you name a toothless bear? A gummy bear!
94. How does a penguin construct its home? It assembles it together!
95. What’s a feline’s method of maintaining law and order? Claw enforcement.
96. How do you plan a cosmic party? You need to plant.
97. Why can’t a leopard engage in hide and seek? It’s always spotted.
98. Why did the biscuit consult a doctor? It felt quite crummy.
99. What do you call counterfeit spaghetti? An impasta!
100. Why did the tomato turn a blush red? It spotted the salad dressing!

Funniest Dad Jokes

101. Why did the bike give up? It was feeling doubly exhausted!
102. Do you refer to that cheese that does not belong to you? That’s not yo cheese!
103. Why don’t skeletons brawl with each other? They lack the guts.
104. Why is a bike unable to stand alone? It’s two-tired!
105. What’s orange in color and resembles a parrot? A carrot.
106. I used to loathe beards, but over time, they began to please me.
107. I wish to start a diet, but I feel my plate is already too full.
108. I would crack a joke about pizza, but it tends to get cheesy.
109. What’s the term for an alligator donning a vest? It’s an in-vest-igator!
110. I suggested my wife accept her mistakes… She ended up hugging me.
111. How do you lure a squirrel? Ascend a tree and mimic a nut’s antics!
112. What’s brown and adheres to things? A stick.
113. Why can’t a leopard participate in hide and seek? It can’t hide its spots.
114. Can February be March? Nope, but April may.

Halloween Dad Jokes

115. Why can’t ghosts successfully deceive? Because they’re clear as day.
116. How do you say hi to a witch who only emerges at night? “Good evening, witch!”
117. What type of bean does a ghoul love the most? The human bean.
118. Why do ghouls and monsters get along so well? Because monsters are ghouls’ best buddies!
119. Why are ghosts avid elevator users? It boosts their morale.
120. Why was the mummy incredibly stressed? He was all wrapped up.
121. What did one apparition say to the other? “Been a while since I’ve haunted you!”
122. What’s a vampire’s go-to fruit? A ‘nectarine.
123. Why don’t mummies take a break? They fear unraveling.
124. Who emerged victorious in the zombie clash? None, it was a tie – dead even!
125. Why did the specter visit the bar? For the spectral “boos.”
126. Why do skeletons suffer from self-doubt? They lack someone to love.
127. Why did the decapitated rider start a venture? He aspired to get ahead in life.
128. What did the skeleton order at the diner? Spare ribs, please!
129. What is a vampire’s favorite breed of dog? A Bloodhound!

Worst Dad Jokes

130. Why are some fish afraid to play the piano? They fear the keys.
131. Why do we advise actors to fracture a leg? Every drama comes with a cast.
132. Why don’t skeletons engage in combat? They lack the guts.
133. What color do cats favor the most? Purple.
134. What did the mature bloom communicate to the young bud? Hi, blossom!
135. Why don’t birds need cell phones? They communicate through their unique chirps.
136. What’s the process for organizing a cosmic bash? You just planet.
137. Why do melons prefer matrimony? Because they are cantaloupe.
138. Why can’t a bicycle stand alone? It’s just two tired.
139. Why did the scarecrow receive a reward? It was exceptional within its domain.
140. How does a penguin assemble its dwelling? It assembles the igloo.
141. Why don’t eggs share jokes? They might crack up.
142. Why don’t we share secrets on a farm? The corn possesses auditory senses, and potatoes hold visual perception.
143. What caused the tomato to become red? It spotted the salad changing its leaves.
144. What do you call an imitation noodle? An impasta!

Terrible Dad Jokes

145. What would you name an intrusive chili pepper? It’s Jalapeno personal matters!
146. Why was the computer freezing? It left its Windows ajar.
147. Why are cashiers not allowed to ride bikes? They tend to mess up their balance.
148. Why did the scarecrow get a new phone? He needed better crop-identification technology.
149. Do you know why circles are so warm? They’re a complete 360 degrees!
150. Did you hear about the person who was struck in the head by a beverage can? Fortunately, it was just a soft drink!
151. Why was the math textbook gloomy? It was overloaded with problems to solve.
152. Why was the belt put behind bars? It was caught holding up some pants!
153. Why are farms not good places for gossip? Even the potatoes have eyes.
154. What’s a spaceman’s favorite key on the keyboard? It’s the space bar.
155. Why should you hesitate to hand Elsa a balloon? She might just ‘let it go’.
156. Why was the bike unable to support itself? It was two-tired.
157. Why don’t eggs engage in comedy? They might crack up laughing!
158. How does an octopus charge into battle? Fully armed.
159. Why did the student devour his homework? The educator proclaimed it to be a piece of cake.

Dumb Dad Jokes

160. Have you heard about the claustrophobic astronaut? He was craving some space.
161. Why did the biscuit visit a doctor? It was feeling rather crumbly.
162. What would you call a mystical dog? A Labracadabrador.
163. How do you purify water? You boil the devil out of it!
164. Why don’t skeletons engage in fights? They’re devoid of guts.
165. Have you heard about the blaze at the circus? It was a very intense event.
166. What do you call cheese that’s not your property? It’s not-yo-cheese.
167. What do clouds sport under their raincoats? Thunderpants!
168. Why did the tomato turn all red? It spotted the salad getting dressed.
169. What caused the office computer to catch a chill? It had its Windows cracked open.
170. Why did the scarecrow receive an accolade? It was unrivaled in its domain!
171. What’s the approach to hosting a cosmic-themed celebration? You have to planet well.
172. Why did the math textbook seem so distressed? It had a heap of problems.
173. What’s brown and clings? A twig.

Hilarious Dad Jokes

174. Why should stairs never be trusted? They constantly have us in suspense.
175. Why can’t you spot an elephant concealing itself in a tree? They’ve mastered the art of camouflage.
176. Why did the coffee call emergency services? It was assaulted.
177. What kind of dessert does a specter prefer? Ghoul-berry pie.
178. Have you heard about the number cruncher who gets scared of negative numbers? He could do anything to avoid them.
179. What was the giant flower’s message to the tiny one? Hey, bud!
180. What kind of footwear does a robber prefer? Stealthy sneakers.
181. Why should eggs never be comedians? They might crack under pressure.
182. Why are atoms untrustworthy to scientists? Because they are the building blocks of fabrication.
183. Why did the scarecrow receive accolades? Because it was exceptional in its position.
184. Why did the bike struggle to find its home? It forgot its route bearings.
185. What was one wall’s statement to its partner? Catch you on the corner!
186. What’s an astronaut’s preferred keyboard key? The one that lets them space out.
187. What was one hat’s advice to the other? You hang around; I’ll head out!

Thanksgiving Dad Jokes

188. Why did the cranberries blush? They caught the turkey in the middle of dressing!
189. Why did the Thanksgiving soup feel accomplished? It was brimming with stuffing!
190. What’s the name of a turkey that evaded the Thanksgiving feast? Incredibly lucky.
191. What’s the result of a turkey crossed with a banjo? A turkey that’s able to self-pluck.
192. What type of tunes did the Pilgrims fancy? Plymouth’s rock n’ roll.
193. What would you get by crossing a turkey with a phantom? A ‘poultry geist’ of course!
194. Why did the chef refuse to spice up the Thanksgiving turkey? The turkey insisted on its right to bear arms.
195. What message did the turkey deliver to the huntsman on Thanksgiving? “Quack, quack!”
196. What occurred when the turkey engaged in a brawl? It got its stuffing knocked right out.
197. Why do turkeys keep going, “gobble, gobble”? They never participated in manners training.
198. What was the reason behind the turkey’s invitation to the music group? It had a pair of drumsticks.
199. What sound does a turkey’s phone emit? Wing! Wing!
200. What’s another name for a turkey in a hurry? Swift meal.
201. What was the turkey’s motivation to cross the road not once but twice? To assure everyone it’s no coward!
202. What do you call a turkey mingling with a phantom? A ‘poultry geist’ for sure!

Dark Dad Jokes

203. Why did the computer start to feel chilly? Because it had its Windows wide open!
204. Why do graveyards never hold celebrations? Because everyone’s dying to get in.
205. How do vampires begin their letters? “Tomb to whom it may concern…”
206. In which way do you call a skeleton doing housework? The Grim Sweeper.
207. Why do ghosts have a small social circle? They are too ghoulish for school.
208. What’s a zombie’s favorite kind of street? A dead-end.
209. Why don’t witches trust spell check? They like to spell out their own brew.
210. Who do you call a mummy who wins at music? A wrap star.
211. What is a ghost’s preferred social platform? Boo-tube.
212. Why do demons avoid playing cards? They’re scared of dealing with souls.
213. What kind of sale does a phantom prefer? One that’s all white!
214. What does a monster do when his inbox is full? He marks everything as ‘scare’.
215. What’s a specter’s favorite dessert? Boo-berry pie.
216. What emerges when you intertwine a snowman and a bloodsucker? Frostbite.
217. Why do monsters avoid eating ghosts? They taste like a sheet.

Dad Jokes You’ve Never Heard

218. What do you call a suspicious Italian neighborhood? The Spaghetti.
219. How does legislation become law? It must muscle its way through the legislative body.
220. Why are ants never ill? They carry potent antibodies.
221. What did the mayonnaise utter when someone opened the fridge? “Shut the door, I’m undressing!”
222. Why did the math textbook look so depressing? It had an excess of problems.
223. How would you arrange a cosmic party? You would simply planet.
224. Why did the cookie go to the police station? It experienced a sense of disintegration.
225. What did the sea whisper to the shore? Nothing, it merely extended a friendly greeting.
226. What led Oreo to make a dental appointment? Because it was missing its filling.
227. Why are certain fish afraid of the piano? They fear the bass clef.
228. What’s the most effective way to witness a fly fishing competition? You should live stream it.
229. Why did the scarecrow keep getting job promotions? He was always excellent in his field.
230. What’s the name of a seagull flying above a bay? A bay-gull.
231. Why did the teddy bear refuse dessert? It was sufficiently filled already.
232. What would you name an ensemble of melodious whales? An orchestra.
233. Why is Owl considered a wise bird? Because he is a night rider.
234. Who is the wisest of all animals? Any-Male.

Birthday Dad Jokes

235. What was the elephant’s birthday wish? A trunk full of surprises.
236. Why don’t birthdays ever get boring? They’re an annual event!
237. What do you always receive on your birthday? A year older!
238. What type of music is frightening for balloons? Popping tunes.
239. Why did the birthday cake resemble a stone? It was a marble cake!
240. What rises but never descends? Your age.
241. Why did the tomato blush at the birthday party? It saw the salad dressing!
242. What do you present a 900-pound gorilla for its birthday? Anything it wants.
243. What did the pirate utter on his 80th birthday? Aye, matey years old!
244. What did the birthday candle communicate to the match? “You brighten my life.”
245. How do pickles mark their birthdays? They relish the moment.
246. What’s the guaranteed method to never forget your spouse’s birthday? Neglect it one time!
247. What actions does a clam take on its birthday? He shell-ebrates!
248. What do felines prefer to eat on their birthdays? Mice cream and cake.
249. Why did the birthday boy spread peanut butter across the street? To go with the traffic jam!
250. Why do you think birthday cakes are made? To smite the face of birthday kids.

Conclusion

And there you have it – 250 of the best dad jokes out there. From hilariously funny to puns that make you groan, they cover the entire humor spectrum, from white to dark jokes. Remember, a good dad joke isn’t just about the punchline; it’s about the delivery, too.

Mark Simons

I am a passionate beer connoisseur with a deep appreciation for the art and science of brewing. With years of experience tasting and evaluating various beers, I love to share my opinions and insights with others and I am always eager to engage in lively discussions about my favorite beverage.